So I began dating this wonderful guy who unfortunately lost his wife not even a year ago and is having major medical problems such as heart attacks, extreme pain, etc. I thought that this wouldn’t be much of a problem as he assured me that he wouldn’t let it become a problem. Now two months later, he tells me he is in love with me, wants to eventually marry me, wants me to have his children, and so on. At the same time, he still tells people that his late wife is still his wife and talks about her as if she is still alive- in public and with me, which confuses the h**l out of them and makes me feel like the second woman. I’ve brought this to his attention and he breaks down crying and says that he is sorry and not what he means at all and he’s sorry he is making me feel this way. This has happened more than once.
Now, I battle with severe depression and when I start telling him what I am thinking about, he gets angry that I am thinking this way and then starts crying and telling me that it’s so sad that I feel this way. In turn, I am almost always concerned about his health and if he is doing okay every day, but I don’t cry or get angry over it.
He is very emotional, gets jealous easy, etceria. At the beginning of our relationship, I said no to his asking me out- he cried for two days. When he asked me the second time, I said yes and he got so excited I almost had to take him to the hospital. He’s up and down at the drop of a hat where as I am very steady. He’s a Leo, where as I am a Capricorn. I feel tired after being with him.
He started casually dating me and three other ladies in January- his wife died in December. We started going out steady in April, but I am feeling like I am just filling in the hole his wife left in him (though he swears I am not). We get along great, but we also have opposite views on life and are different religious wise. He wants me to move in with him, but I don’t want to and have told him so- he got angry with me and didn’t talk to me for two days.
What do I do? Do I let him go or try and work this out with him? Is he just using me to fill the hole his late wife left? he still talks to the other three behind my back, could he be cheating? Can we work out with deep core values being completely different?