Spending 24/7 with the OH – how can I make it work?

HomeCategory: RelationshipsSpending 24/7 with the OH – how can I make it work?
Enamoured asked 6 years ago

I started my own business in Jan 2012. In Aug 2013, my husband left his full time job to come and work with me full time. I needed the help and I didn’t want to employ someone. Plus, my husband worked in retail so had horrid shifts and just xmas day off etc. No more late shifts now which is great. However, now we spend 24/7 together!! Literally. We don’t really have hobbies anymore, we’ve been too busy, but we’re hoping to fix tis in the new year. My husband is really happy with the way things are – but he would be, he gets all the benefits, like better working hours, shorter shifts, more days off sometimes, less responsibility. But I find it hard to train him because he isn’t really interested in this field. He can do the job but he doesn’t want to progress the skills I have showed him which sometimes makes my job really stressful – it’s like having a teen working for you sometimes! But these are not my biggest problems. He used to have to wear a suit but now he wears overalls and he has started to let himself go a bit – let his stubble get out of hand, not have his hair cut often enough, wears trackies instead the proper trousers and wears trackies on his days off 🙁 He likes to joke around a lot and he does it at work but I find this extremely unprofessional and I don’t like it. I’ve asked him to stop and he calls me miserable – see what I mean about being a teen! Whenever I try and teach him a better way of doing things – he still has a lot to learn for the job – he says I’m criticising him and gets defensive, then we argue in the workplace which drives me insane!  Also, he gets the odd opportunity to go out without me – eg my brother asking him to go and play badmington with him at the gym – and he turns them down 🙁 saying only if I will go with him!!  We’ve been trying for a baby too for a year now and it’s not going well, and now it’s putting a strain on us. He says he’s still as sexually attracted to me as ever but I don’t feel the same. I feel like all those silly little things I didn’t like about him but didn’t matter, now cause a rift. I’ve tried talking to him but he just gets defensive and says I just want to criticise! He says he feels like he can’t do anything right but I told him I can’t say anything right.  (sorry I don’t know how to turn bold and italic off now the icons aren’t responding).  I can’t win. I’ve told him he’s very sensitive and this makes him angry.  Don’t get me wrong, he’s a great husband and I admire him for jacking his job in and trusting me to earn our keep and train him in a totally different field. He works hard, I just wish he wanted to progress his skills and we could spend a bit of healthy time apart. What do you think?