7 year relationship ended, new girlfriend within months?

HomeCategory: Breakups7 year relationship ended, new girlfriend within months?
WillGetThru asked 7 years ago

I don’t know why I’m letting this get to me so much. I can’t control my ex’s actions or behaviors But it is getting to me. He ended 7 year our relationship about 8 months ago. We both felt something was missing, we were just co existing as a couple and really encouraging each other to grow. He said he had been unhappy for 2 years but didn’t tell me bc he thought he should be happy with me bc I’m a great person, but he wasn’t. He held on and this past year I started to realize I wanted more from the relationship (i.e talk about important world issues, laugh, tease, play, etc.) we weren’t doing any of that. On top of that, I had lost myself and never focused on my own happiness. It was heartbreaking feeling so lost within myself and the relationship. My bf was putting me down bc it seemed like I didn’t have motivation to do things. In all honesty, I did…I’ve just been confused about what I want to do with my life and I got comfortable on my situation that I stopped really thinking about me. Anyway, he decided to end it bc he felt that we don’t have chemistry or love and that we aren’t in love and encouraging each other to grow. I couldn’t take this…I wanted to do couples counseling, etc. to try but he was insistent that he didn’t want that and that it wouldn’t help if the love isn’t already there. So he broke up with me and I kept contacting him 4 months after that, he tried to console me and make me see the logic in all of this instead of getting wrapped up in my emotions, but all I saw was that he would be gone from my life. I eventually stopped but 2-3 weeks after I stopped contacting he got a new gf. It hurt like h**l and it still does. I don’t understand how he could just move on so quickly. 4 months after a 7 year relationship…I’m trying my hardest not to focus on it but it’s difficult, especially since he changed his profile picture to a picture of he and his new gf. I feel abandoned. I know we were having problems already but I keep thinking if she was a factor in his decision to not try harder to make t work. Again, I know I should let this go because it doesn’t serve me any good to dwell but I just don’t understand, I was ready to try again and get counseling but he stopped and then got a new gf. I’m really heartbroken and I can’t seem to concentrate.